Barbara Roberts, Homeopath

Healing is Forgetting

When you first consult a Homeopath, the consultation is long and comprehensive. You talk about the things that are a problem for you now, including physical and mental emotional symptoms as well as your past. Your Homeopath prescribes a remedy, and you go on your way. 

Sometimes it doesn’t really seem like anything has changed. This may even be a little frustrating, but you go along for your next appointment with your Homeopath. 

You talk about what is happening in your life now, your mood and any physical symptom, and then there is time for the Homeopath to ask some questions. It often goes a little like this:

Homeopath: How is your back?

Client: My back? It’s fine.

Homeopath: Last time I saw you you were in a lot of pain and having trouble sleeping because of it.

Client: I had forgotten. I haven’t had any problem with that for weeks now.

This is such a common phenomenon, that it is frequently remarked on by Homeopaths. It also shows the way healing works – that once something is no longer a problem for you, it is forgotten and you move on. Another thing we see is that another problem has come up – often an issue that was there before but was overshadowed by the reason you sought help in the first place. 

This phenomenon has been studied in the context of childbirth, and one study particularly from Japan showed that women tended to have more positive memories of their childbirth experience 5 years after childbirth (Takehara, et al. 2014). Anecdotally when women have their second or subsequent child they often remark that they had forgotten all the things that go with looking after a newborn – from the sleepless nights to the fact your washing inexplicably doubles for such a tiny new member of the family. 

It is also apparent when there are changes in mental emotional state. For example someone who is irritable or angry all the time in a first consultation, when questioned in a follow-up may state that the people around them are no longer being difficult. They cannot see that the change is that they are no longer easily irritated. This can also be a comment from someone else, that friends or family say they are much easier to get along with!

There are of course exceptions to this, things that you cannot just forget. Traumatic experiences fall under this category, and grief also – you would not want to forget the person you loved. Here healing is not forgetting the pain of the past, but instead reducing triggers and the impact it has on your day to day life. Not forgetting, but allowing remembrance and reflection without blocking the life you still have to live. 

Healing is a journey, and it looks different for different people, but what is consistent is that as your heal you don’t need to hold onto the pain of the past and the trauma. You can discard it and forget, and just take moments every now and again to reflect on how far you have come. 


Takehara K, Noguchi M, Shimane T, Misago C. A longitudinal study of women’s memories of their childbirth experiences at five years postpartum. BMC Pregnancy Childbirth. 2014 Jul 5;14:221. doi: 10.1186/1471-2393-14-221. PMID: 24996683; PMCID: PMC4227007.

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